Friday, January 8, 2016
Being a mom is sometimes ridiculous. A lot of days (especially these snowy frigid days), Mr. Baby and I just stay at home and those days are usually pretty chill. But I tend to get stir crazy if we haven't left the house in a few days, and you know, sometimes we need to buy groceries. On Tuesday this week, I was feeling like going out, but didn't have any specific errands to run, so I was like "hey, I'll go to Which Wich, my favorite lunch place!" Seemed like a good plan. It was after the lunch rush, but I didn't think about how tricky it would be with the boy.
If you've never been there (you should go!), you fill out a bag with your sandwich order on it, and then you go up to order and pay, and then they call your name when your food is ready. Simple enough. Unless you are carrying around a tiny menace to society! As I was filling out my sandwich bag, Mr. Baby managed to grab a sign off the wall, ripping it in half. Oops. I took the pieces up to the cashier and apologized. I was so relieved it was the manager who basically knows me because I went there like once a week when I was pregnant. So as I'm trying to pay, Mr. Baby decides to be as wiggly as possible, and do his best to dive out of my arms. Not cool, baby! Anyway, I got my order in and paid, and then went to find a table. But then I needed to grab a high chair, which are way back in the corner. I'm not going to leave my bag unattended, so I lug everything back and somehow manage to wrangle a high chair off the stack, and carry it back to the table. (Note - chivalry is absolutely dead, according to the 5 or so businessmen who just stared awkwardly at me.)
I get Mr. Baby all situated with the high chair and the cover, and then realized I needed to get my drink. Well, I'm definitely not going to leave him unattended, so I pull him out, go get the drink. Get back to the table, put him back in the chair. Then they call my name. Okay, get baby back out, go grab sandwich. It's ridiculous. So I finally have everything I need, and he is happy in the high chair, so I got to eat in relative peace.
**An aside: the table next to me was 2 girls who are in college. They were cracking me up, talking about getting ready to graduate, and the guys they are dating. I should have been live tweeting their whole conversation. Did you know there's a formula to determine whether a guy is too old to date, and therefore creepy? The one girl is dating a 28 year old, but I guess you take his age, divide by 2, and add 7. Since she's 21, it's just barely not creepy. Who comes up with this stuff??? Also, apparently really smart guys can sometimes be socially awkward. Who knew? (everyone).
Anyway, I finished eating and decided we should head to Babies R Us, because I needed to buy my friend a baby shower present. I just needed to feed the boy before we left. I got him out, went to refill my drink, and came back to the table to feed him. He was in my lap, and I was digging in the diaper bag for his bottle, when he slapped my drink right off the table. All 20 ounces went into the high chair seat cover, and then spilled onto the floor. And I can't even do anything about it, because I am holding him! The college girls sprang to their feet to help. One of the workers looked like he was coming over, but he was actually going to dig through the trash to look for a lost cell phone (oh it was a crazy day for the Which Wich employees). I knew we were going to need more than paper towels, so I went and talked to the manager again. And again, she was very gracious. She mopped everything up, and I went ahead and fed the boy. Then I got a refill again and we went out to the car. I got him into the carseat, got the soaking wet high chair cover into the back where it wouldn't ruin anything fabric, and started the car. Right before I backed out, the manager comes running out "your drink is on the top of your car!" Oh man... I'm a mess. We didn't go to Babies R Us. We just went home where I could avoid any more embarrassment!
Just in case you thought I was one of those moms who has it all together.